Scripture: Jesus said: The Pharisee
stood up and prayed about himself: “God, I thank you that I am not like all
other men - robbers, evil doers, adulterers - or even like this tax collector.
I fast twice a week, and give a tenth of all I get.” Luke 18:11-12,
In a moment
of silliness, I inquired, “Mirror, mirror, in my hand. Who is the most handsome
in the land.”
Starting to lay the mirror down, I added, “Well, mirrors talk for
And a voice responded, “He pays better than you do!”
(To simplify the following dialogue, ‘L’
will stand for Leland; ‘M’ for Mirror.)
L: What? Oh, so you can talk.
L: So answer the question.
M: Do I have to?
L: That’s the rule. I ask “Who is the most handsome guy in the land?,”
and you always answer, “You are, O Master.”
M: Ahhh - You know that saying about “pride goeth before a fall.”?
M: Get ready for a thump!
L: What do you mean?
M: Mirrors can not tell a lie. You are not the most handsome
L: Oh! I’m not, huh? Pray tell, why not.
M: Ugly, ugly, ugly!
L: Well, thanks a lot! You know what happens to smart-aleck mirrors? Now
YOU get ready for a thump!
M: I wouldn’t do that if I were you!
L: And why not?
M: Seven years bad luck, you know.
L: Oh! Well, just the same, you deserve a good smashing for
what you said. By the way, I see that you have a mirror on both sides. Does
that mean you are two-faced?
M: All the better to see the truth.
L: I’ll bet! Well, just for fun, let’s try a second opinion.
(L. Turns mirror over)
Mirror, mirror, in my hand, who is the most handsome guy in the land?
M2: You are right! He IS ugly!
L: OK, OK. Well, if I’m not number 1, number 2 is still not so bad.
M: Uhhh . . . pick another number.
M: More than 70 times 7.
L: Peter used that term in the Bible to mean a number so big it was beyond
M: You got it!
L: Now, really!
OK, I’ll grant that there are probably guys
that are more handsome than me. Just tell me who number One is, and I’ll go
and congratulate him.
M: Sorry, I can’t give out his name.
L: What you mean is, you don’t know, and don’t want to look foolish.
M: Oh, I know all right, but after that Sleeping Beauty incident, we
mirrors are not permitted to tell who it is.
L: Sleeping Beauty?
M: Yeah, my cousin, “Mirror on the Wall,” told that nasty old witch
who the most beautiful girl was, and she put her to sleep for a hundred years.
L: Now do I look like the kind of person who would do something
just to get even?
M: Well . . .
L: Watch it!
M: Any way, there are not enough princesses these days who are willing
to risk kissing guys who are snoring away! Sorry, just can’t risk it.
L: I suppose you are right. But does that happen often? People get mad
and get even if they can’t be number One?
M: Oh! All the time! For example, Jesus told about the vain man,
praying in the Temple. Now suppose that I told him he wasn’t as perfect
as he thoughthe was, and it was the tax collector who went home
L: And you think he would do something to that other man, the tax collector?
M: Well, jealously can cause big trouble. Think back to Cain and Able,
and how Cain was the first murderer. And their parents, Adam and Eve.
Adam blamed Eve, Eve blamed that old snake, Satan, and everyone except
mirrors has been lying ever since.
L: Sounds to me like you have your own case of “Better than thou.”
M: Well . . . Anyway, us mirrors have been looking at people
for thousands of years, and some things never change.
L: Like what?
M: Well, tomorrow I’ll still be a mirror, and . . .
L: And what?
M: And you will still be ugly!
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